What is charisma? I named my blog after this word for a few reasons. For one, I love the meaning. Psychology Today described it best: “Charismatic leaders are essentially very skilled communicators – individuals who are both verbally eloquent, but also able to communicate to followers on a deep, emotional level. They are able to articulate a compelling or captivating vision, and are able to arouse strong emotions in followers.”
Some of the best leaders are characterized as charismatic. For me, it’s that oomph magnetic type of personality that grabs your attention without you realizing it. You want to hang onto every word this magnetic person has to say because they exude confidence and a trustworthy aura. This can be a good thing if the person in question has good intention. There are several people who are charismatic who use their power (or influence) in a negative direction. However, I’m going to take a leap of faith and trust that you use your power for good. =)
In my opinion, a successful blogger is someone who captivates and inspires with their vision through unique photographs, their bewitching language, astonishing stories, etc. When you tell a story, you want people to listen. Some people are naturally charismatic leaders in their environment. They are usually the person who people gravitate towards because their personality commands it. There are also leaders who learn to be charismatic which can strengthen their connection to others. We all want to make connections, right?
Here are a few tips to get you started on your journey to charisma.
Listen to your gut. Learning to trust your intuition will make you feel confident in your decisions and that is an attractive quality. If you’re not sure how to do this, go to a quiet place, light some candles in yummy fragrance such as citrus or clean linen (my fave) and close your eyes. Listen. This usually works for me if I have an important decision to make and I’m racking my brain for the answer.
Maintain eye contact with the person you are talking to and really listen when they speak. Depending on certain cultures, eye contact shows respect. It also shows that you are focused on your audience which will make people feel connected to you. Maintaining eye contact is natural for me but everyone is different. If someone is looking down or elsewhere throughout most of the conversation, it can come off as they’re bored or uninterested and that’s no bueno.
Do something nice for a friend. A small gesture goes a long way. The other day my friend asked to borrow my metro card. I only had a few bucks on it but gave it anyway. On my way home that day, I swiped my card and realized she refilled my card with a much larger amount than I had. I was like wow! I did not expect that and she did NOT have to do that. It so happened to be my budget was tight that week so this token of kindness truly helped. Doing something nice for someone else not only feels good but it makes the other person want to reciprocate.
Dress with purpose. Think about what you are wearing right now. Does your outfit give off the vibe you want to portray? If so, awesome. If not, figure out the look you’re going for and choose pieces accordingly. Maybe a long, flowy dress makes you feel free. Or maybe jeans and a bright top make you feel sexy. Wear what makes you feel like you can take on the world.
Be genuine. When you first meet someone, focus on the individual. Small talk is a great way to engage a stranger. I find it takes off the pressure of trying to figure out what to talk about. Let the conversation flow. When in doubt, start with a compliment. Be sure what you say is genuine. Anything forced will immediately come off as fake. If it doesn’t work out with one person, at least you tried to make a new friend. Congratulate yourself on being brave enough to initiate conversation with a stranger.
Smile! People are attracted to happy people. Give off vibes you want to receive. Also, smiling makes you more approachable which makes it easier for people to come up to you. Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there. Being vulnerable is an important part of establishing a connection with someone.
Get out of your comfort zone. Stepping into unknown territory can be exciting. Life is about discovering your full potential. Take on that work project you’re afraid of tackling. Go on a blind date. Be the first on the dance floor (I’m working on taking my own advice). Whatever you have been putting off because you are afraid, do it! You will feel ten times better afterward. Regardless the outcome, you will have gained some experience.
Thank you for reading my first installation of style tips for your road to adding a lil charisma into your life. This week’s tips were focused on interactions with strangers and friends. Next week I will talk more about creating a positive presence within yourself. I promise, it won’t be as long ;).
P.S. I am submitting this post to IFB Project #99 Summer School Post a tutorial. If you haven’t heard of IFB (Independent Fashion Bloggers) check out their site now. Even if you are not a blogger, it is full of style tips, blogging tips that can be applied to general life and inspiration of all types.